Are you stuck in the past?


11 days ago I left paid employment. The 40 – 50 hours a week I spent commuting and working finished.

That is after an entire working life spent doing that.

For the past few years I have been building my coaching business; training, practicing, working with people; developing my skills and ability as a coach. In the last year I cranked that up exponentially. For many months I was getting up just after 6am and often working until 1am.

Every break I would do something for my passion; write, record a video, coach someone, learn something.

In my car on the way to work, on the way to my grandma, to my girlfriend, that would be time to keep honing my skill, to come up with new ideas, to coach someone.

Every minute of every day was filled, the only spare time I allowed myself was with my girlfriend at the weekend; that was our time, and it was precious.

Fast forward 11 days.

I now have all that extra time in the middle of each day Monday to Friday. I can devote as much as I want to whatever I choose and yet I still feel like I have no time.

My days are full from the minute I wake up until the moment my head hits the pillow.

My mind is still racing.

There is still so much I don’t have time to do!

What the Hell is going on?

My coach John talks about having an “Escape the City” Mindset; so when people leave jobs in the city, they may have escaped their physical surroundings but their mind is still stuck there. They haven’t yet moved on.

That’s where I am.

I am living in the past, those years of rushing, of having no time are still with me. I am boxed in and haven’t yet escaped.

Over the past week I have coached 5 new people; people who I wouldn’t have been able to coach previously because of my job. In 3 of those conversations the same theme came up; they each had a mind that was too busy. Their thoughts were racing and they couldn’t switch off.

I gave each of them an exercise to do every day, one that I know helps with that; sitting in silence letting the thoughts flow. My friend Noam reminded me of this when I saw him last week; the way it works is that you block out some time each day 15 – 20 minutes (you can set an alarm if that helps you) and you just go with whatever comes up. So, you follow the thoughts down any avenue they go without trying to steer them or change them or block them. You just follow every thought until the time it up.

It is said that we have around 30,000 thoughts a day and so without giving time to process them, you are creating a traffic jam. This process lets the thoughts get off the busy motor way of your mind by using the slip roads (off ramps) and so the cars can keep moving and flowing unhindered.

So, after giving this to the third person yesterday it finally clicked; I have also been talking to me. 

That is exactly what I could do to process all of the thoughts I have been carrying inside, that have been blocking me and keeping me feeling like I have to race around; to start letting go of my “city” mind set and start living in the present.



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